Still waiting….

I really hate waiting. I know, who does? But I really, really, really hate waiting. It’s one of the reasons I started knitting, a portable way to kill time and have something to show for it. It is hard enough when you are waiting for something good to happen, but when you are waiting for something you know is going to be bad or worse, time seems to all but stand still.

I am seriously not good at waiting either. I am not, nor ever have been, a particularly patient person. I am a doer, a fixer, a sort-it-out-and-make-it-all-better kind of girl. Sitting around, trying to pretend everything is normal seems ridiculous to me. I like to get busy, and see progress and decisions followed by big action. Like many others I suppose, I feel better with constructive activity that shows purpose and produces results. You can load me up with a list a mile long, and as long as it gets me to the goal, I’m ok with that. In this regard, work is driving me crazy, as projects results are hard to come by and are long and arduous journeys. Not a very good distraction at the moment I’m afraid. And you might think that all this restlessness would translate into house cleaning frenzy, but no, this is not to be either. I may have the time but certainly not the inclination. The disorder suits my frame of mind.

I am un-focused, and I so I fidget, bite my nails, pick fluff off my sweater, over groom the poor cat, move piles from one side of the room to the other. I fuss over small things and people and I’m restless and have a hard time sitting still for long. And yet with all this energy I can’t seem to get anything accomplished. I flit from one task to another, pick up one project only to abandon it minutes later for another. I try to watch TV but the shows are trite and irritating and the people infuriating with their petty lives and problems, I want to reach into the TV and slap them and so I flick from one station to another but there is nothing that holds my attention. I try to watch the news but the gods are against me with every evening report bringing stories of the inadequacies of our provincial health care system, which send me over the roof with frustration. I try to read books, newspapers, magazines, but halfway through I realize I haven’t a clue what I just read.

My thoughts are scattered, interrupted, un-organized. It has taken me a week just to begin to write again, and even last night I voiced to Susan that I was still having difficulties with my words being all jumbled up like tangled yarn inside my head. In the middle of typing I find myself just staring at the wall, my brain twirling around.

I have hardly knit, working on just the second of my Knitpicks socks, which under normal circumstances would be well finished by now, but I only just started the heel flap last night. My fingers have forgotten their rhythm, and while working without careful watching, I am tink-ing back more than I am knitting, adding more to my growing frustrations.

I am doing my best to follow good advice to keep mind and body busy, and know that if I am successful, the time will eventually pass and all too soon we will receive the information we are seeking. This week there was a TAFK night, with yummy birthday cake for the other Kate, and last night was KnitNight at the Pinecrest Chapters, which is a great way to be distracted by all the other knitters and their projects. I picked up the Yarn Harlot’s new book in hopes that not only would it be entertaining (that’s guaranteed!) but that it’s short essay format would be an easier read on my frazzled brain cells. Tomorrow is a friends Stag and Doe, and dinner beforehand with more friends.

My friends, my extraordinary friends, are solidly beside me, those who know checking in frequently, listening patiently, offering up all manners of support, help and distraction. And those who don’t know yet, intuitively knowing as women do on some level that something is amiss, and holding their questions and waiting patiently for whatever is to come.

And as a family we are beginning to feel some of the initial shock finally starting wearing off, as reality sets in. And although gravely serious, the possibility of finally receiving long sought-after answers has offered at last some sense of pending relief.

Hummm - looks like some of the problems with getting the words out is starting to be rectified, if I look above this line. But I am still waiting……….

Knit on………..

Breathing deeply into a paper bag....

Its been quiet here, I know. As we say in our family, we are having a moment. I hope you understand.

And although it is not going to be a short moment, I hope we'll have our little sail boat uprighted and catching the spring breeze shortly. I am not sure if I will share it with you, it's not exactly up to me, but I'm breathing into a paper bag as slowly as I can. Knitting seems futile but it is the only thing that is keeping me from running amuck in the streets, pulling my hair out and scratching my eyes.

Please keep my little family in your hearts, and I'll be back as soon as I can.

Knit on.....

Spring is in the air!

I can see my rock garden – ok, about a half a square foot of it! I’m taking this as a sure sign that Spring is imminent. We are grasping at anything that remotely resembles Spring-like conditions around here. And with today’s –15*C windchill, we need all the Spring-y reminders we can get! So much for March going out like a lamb, as the saying goes. April is sounding like a pack of howling hyenas! Last night the house was fairly rocking and banging with the 50km windy gusts, and I feared my birch tree would finally give up the fight to stay upright, but this morning at 5:00am when I peeked out to survey the damage in the dim morning light, it was still there, standing proudly!

The first of the Knitpicks socks is almost finished – sadly, there has been some bleeding of the yarn, staining my hands badly as I knit. I am hoping it will wash out without fading the socks too badly, as I love the vibrant colorway. I called Knitpicks customer service to discuss the concern, and I have to say they were absolutely fantastic, and sending replacement yarn immediately at no expense to me. A different colorway mind you, as I preferred not to receive the same dye lot. What a delight to speak with the staff there – they even went out to the warehouse to select another colorway for me, describing the lovely colors of the new Peacock Multi colorway that I ultimately selected! I won’t be having any concerns with placing future orders I can tell you, especially with customer service like that!

And in anticipation of Spring renewal, a spring clean housekeeping issue if you will (pun intended!). This evening the G-man and I are re-doing our wills, which are badly out-dated, pre-dating even our purchase of our current house some 5 years ago! I have been badgering him for ages now, even to the extent of threatening this last vacation south to not go if the appointment wasn’t at least made! And even then I threatened to make the appointment myself with another lawyer, as he “kept forgetting” to call the lawyer he wanted to use. What is with these guys – I hear more lamenting from wives about the struggle they have with their significant others about getting a will in place, and I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t experienced it first hand. It seems they, the G-man and the like, think that if they make a will, then they are tempting certain fate (I hear this a common theme amongst policemen, firemen, enforcement types, etc.). To them it’s like a Murphy’s Law kind of thing. If you do you die! It’s crazy talk! Certain terrible fate awaits those who are left behind if there is no will in place Boys, so get off your kesters and git‘er done! Your wife will love you for it!

Knit on….

I’m still here…….

I’m just hiding.

Because I am knitting socks again.

Not knitting my Citrine socks.

Not knitting any of my other WIP’s either.

Just knitting my Knitpicks Essentials Sock Yarn socks.

Because I want to.

Because they are for me.

Because no one will tell me not to.

Because I’m the boss of my knitting.

So there.

I’m still hiding.

Knit on……..

Powering down….

Did you do your bit for Planet Earth on Saturday evening?

Yup – I had signed on, for Earth Hour that is! I was willing to give up a little light on Saturday evening for the betterment of Planet Earth.

Still, you know what they say about best laid plans and all. The G-man and I were dining at the at friends home around that time, and although she was definitely up for the cause, and we tried to dine by candlelight (how romantic!), cooking by candlelight on the BBQ and ensuring that e-coli was not part of the menu proved to be a greater challenge than we anticipated!

We thought we’d check out the night sky, but 8pm was not really late enough to get the pitch black we needed to see the stars very well. When the big power outage happened a few summers ago across the South-Eastern US and Canada, each evening we would step outside to watch the stars appear. Interestingly, this was when I met many of my neighbors whom had not ventured out on the street before, usually just zipping in and out of the garages with their cars, rarely stopping to say hello. And the night view back then was fantastic to say the least – it was something you would usually not be able to see inside the City limits.

As well, I had not considered that by not being home we would not be able to execute the powering down of all the lights set on timers in our home, which is the way we conserve power on a daily basis. Most of our major power guzzlers, with the exception of the refrigerator, are on some sort of timer, which shuts them down completely (no standby power) for 8 or more hours each day. The first year we did this we saw a 25% reduction in our hydro bill for the year! To achieve Earth Hour we needed to be home to manually override the timers, and so we failed the challenge.

The boys tried humor me and play along during dinner but they were not as boy scout as I know the G-man can be. He is actually a great boy scout, with lots of hand crank operated radios, flashlights and other fun toys, which have come in very handy now and again, as we are often without power here in the west end of Ottawa.

I heard the results this morning – only about a 4-5% reduction in power in the participating cities – I thought it would be more but considering our own lack of involvement, I’m not really surprised. Actually I’m a bit disappointed in myself, as I could have planned better and made a bigger personal impact.

Here’s an un-related thought for the day: "Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not using it in a fruit salad"

Knit on…..

Just checking in…

Our weekend in the Quebec Eastern Townships was lovely – even the weather was very nice, lots of sun, and little signs of spring everywhere we went. We saw white geese, black turkey’s, and lots and lots of deer kicking up their heels in the corn fields. The streams were running under the snow, and the maple trees were tapped for sap, and sugar shacks were in full production. I love maple syrup and Quebec does produce some of the best in the country!

I got a chance to go to Sutton, PQ and did get to go back to Boutique Le Cotillon (sadly, no website) and returned home victorious with 4 balls of sock yarn. After all, what’s a trip without a few souvenirs? Three balls of sock yarn from the gorgeous Holiday Collection from OnLine in my favourite colors of orange and chartreuse and also blue jean friendly colorway, and one ball of Regia in a muted burnt orange, brown and soft purple. They were all duly fondled and ogled over at TAFK last night, and various members made pitches as to why they should be the recipients of the completed socks!! Can’t say as I blame them – the colors are simply luscious – they look like candy wouldn’t you agree:

And I’m finihsing up the toes of the On Line socks – no way could I have finished them over the weekend as planned – travel knitting time was completely wasted in the car due to the enormous (way bigger than usual!) potholes that the Quebec roads are famous for! My kidneys near gave up the ghost for all the bumping and bucking the car did! I could barely stop my chattering teeth let alone manipulate 2mm needles into fingering weight yarn. So sad, 8 hours of prime knitting time wasted! Anyway, DD2 is thrilled with the almost finished OnLine socks colorway 82, and they bring spring to mind every time I look at them

So there you have it. Now I’m back on track with the divine Citrine socks. No distractions please!

Knit on….

Recipe for Kate.. (thanks Susan!)

The Recipe For Kate

3 parts Daring 2 parts Magnetism 1 part Laughter Splash of Seductiveness Finish off with a little umbrella and straw

What's the Recipe for Your Personality?